O my Brooklyn

Various foodstuffs the shy and retiring men in my neighborhood have expressed interest in consuming together, perhaps as a metaphor for lovemaking; I’m not entirely sure, they’re so vague sometimes:

• milk
• collard greens
• neckbone (solely in conjunction with the collard greens)
• barbecue sauce
• ribs
• cornbread
• pie
• cherry pie
• pumpkin pie
• any kind of pie, really
• whipped cream
• fish tacos

Apparently nothing about my body inspires anything that Gwyneth Paltrow would consider feeding her children, or anything that they’d make on Posh Nosh.