Trick or treat

X: So, are you ready for Halloween?
O: Oh man… I’m spending my Halloween this year on a flight back from London.
X: Oh no! You love Halloween! You get so into Halloween!
O: I know!
X: Always with the zombie thing!
O: And I’ve had my costume since April! I just have to hope some people will throw parties on Saturday night too.
X: Wait, why don’t you just wear your costume on the plane? That would be funny.
O: That probably wouldn’t go over too well.
X: Why not?
O: Well, with the zombie makeup and all. All the fake blood.
X: Oh, right. What if you just wear the costume clothes, and then put the zombie makeup on in the airplane bathroom, once you’re in the air?
O: Yeah… I was going to go as a 1960s airline stewardess zombie. I don’t think they’d appreciate that, on an international flight.
X: Oh, wow.
O: Yeah.
X: So at first they’d just think you were crazy, dressed like a filght attendant, and then you’d come back from the bathroom with blood all over your face—
O: And they’d put me in airplane jail.
X: You’d be on the No Fly list forever!
O: At least the person in the seat next to me would have a good story to tell.
X: “Any meal requirements, miss? Vegetarian, kosher, gluten-free, braaaaaains?”