Our Lips Are Sealed

Tonight I stayed with the son of my parents’ friends whom I used to nanny for in the summers I was in high school and college. He’s 10 now, and his 9 year old sister was at a slumber party for the evening, so we went to Blockbuster, where I told him he could pick the movie. He came back with a Mary-Kate and Ashley flick. I raised my eyebrows at him increduously, and he said, “Dude, they’re hot!”

After watching, I must say: dude, they are. Although just minutes away from their centerfold debut, don’t you think?

Watching the movie made me feel woefully under-accessorized. The Olsen twins are so much cuter at fourteen than I was. I spent fourteen shut up in my room, listening to the Pixies and scribbling furiously in secret notebooks—or, as Erin likes to say, “journaling through some rage.” Until tonight, I thought that was a pretty cool way to spend fourteen. Now I wish I had a twin sister and I’d gone to more beach barbecues. Damn you and your cute sarong skirts and your nine exceutive producer credits, Michelle Tanner!