Don’t call it a comeback:

Okay, so, fuck it. Apparently “taking a break” doesn’t help any more with creativity than it does with boyfriends. I want to write, and if it’s not up to par, then I’ll just keep writing. You don’t have to read it; it won’t hurt my feelings. If sharks are jumped, then maybe I’ll take a cue from Roxy and do it in style, while wearing alligators as waterskis.

I bought a domain name and wanted to surprise you all by coming back with a fabulous new website, but then I remembered that I know absolutely nothing about how to actually make a fabulous new website. Who knew? Maybe I’ll get a Mysterious Benefactor or marry some sort of internet whiz kid or something, and they’ll design one for me while I lounge around, eating grapes and reading Olsen twin fan fiction, but in the meantime, this is all I got.

(Dude, I was just being funny, but do you think there really is Olsen twin fan fiction? Maybe I should go back to that break.)

So, in short, I’m back because I missed this, but there are no promises that it won’t be stale or lame. If it is, feel free to let me know. Hecklers are always welcome.

It’s not just the whiskey talking; I really do love you, baby.